Cindy has fake breasts and you don’t know her. Can you touch them? Yes, whether you’re a woman or a man.

Women can use “The Informational Approach”. Say you see Cindy at the gym and ask, “Hey, I was admiring how your breasts just lift. Those are real – right?” She’ll respond no. She’ll probably offer, but even if she doesn’t, a woman can ask Cindy, “Can I have a feel?”

Now straight men can’t do this. The reason why women can and men can’t is because the subtext of the conversation above suggests curiosity in boob jobs or other methods in defying gravity. (TIP: Women use subtext in conversation) The above conversation totally works with asking the type of bra Cindy’s wearing.

For a guy to feel strange breasts, Cindy has to reveal having a boob job AND how much someone else paid for them. She’s inviting her breasts to be touched because she loves attention.  With this anyone, even you, can legitimately ask, “Do you mind if I feel them?”   I may also throw in, “I’ve never felt fake breasts before” OR “How I’ve felt a lot of them and have gathered an expertise…”

For anyone who believes I’m advocating men molesting breast, I would never reveal “How a gay man feels strange breasts.”  Revealing that secret would be very dangerous to women everywhere – and I swore an oath.

(This is what I’ve learned in Southern California.)

[Hi... This is the first draft of the first scene of a stage play I'm working on...  The formatting is off as WordPress doesn't allow for adjusting formats, tabs, margins...]

TWO BUSINESSMEN walk through a lobby in Downtown Los Angeles .  A welcome board reads, “STEINBECK – TONY WEDDING RECEPTION.  CENTRAL BALL ROOM – 2nd FL”.  CHRIS KLEIN, male 24, dressed modern and artsy, he’s confident but out of place here.  JUSTIN BERNSTEIN, 29, dressed in 30s attire and top hat walk onto the stage.  He acts like he’s out of place.

JUSTIN – You are going to love this place.
CHRIS – Why?
JUSTIN – Well.  This place has a great whiskey bar and a great roof-deck club.  Plus, you’ve seen Wedding Crashers?
CHRIS – Was this in it?
JUSTIN – No, but there’s always a wedding to crash here.  Steinbeck-James seem like they’re going to have hot girls.
CHRIS – That’s all good but I’d love to just chat with some down to earth people.
JUSTIN – For down to Earth, you could go to some farm.

(A loud buzz and a goofy ringtone plays.  CHRIS looks at JUSTIN.)
(A WOMAN, 50s, ragged and out of place walks on stage followed by a BOY, 15.)

JUSTIN – Hold up a sec.

(Justin walks a little bit and pulls out his phone.  Chris pulls out his phone.)

CHRIS –Am I just supposed to wait while he checks his phone?  As a kid, how amazing it was to see a phone drilled into the center console of a car – the first time.  (To an older person in the audience) Do you know what I’m talking about?  Remember the phone had no battery and was plugged into the car battery.  The younger generation will remember the first flip phone that was pocket sized for a large pocket.  Shaped like a brick and weighed only slightly less than one.  (To a young person in the audience) You’re to young for that.  I only know because I had a part-time job at the Museum of Cellular Telephony.  How about the PDA?  Imagine one hundred years ago telling someone how one day there’d be a device that could get lost in your pocket containing a typewriter to send letters and would replace the newspaper, the calendar book, the arcade, the deck of cards, the roadmap… what else?  Oh, it would run on a battery that could last for a couple of days.  They’d call you crazy and tell you it’s more realistic that we’d all be flying around in personal automoplanes which would be a flying car running free from the use of any gas or oil.  How we have progressed?  I want to thank those of you who turned your phones to vibrate.  Thanks for only feeling the message from your girlfriend.  (to a man in the audience with a woman) Yes you sir – with the wife.  If you weren’t forced to be here, would you give anyone, either your girlfriend or wife, or friends this much of your undivided attention.  Do you remember when you talked with the people around you?

(The Woman and Boy approach Chris.)

WOMAN – Excuse me?  You haven’t happened to see my daughter?
CHRIS – (looks around) Ah, no.  I just got here.

(Justin walks back.)

JUSTIN – What’s going on here?
WOMAN – I’ve lost my daughter.  A gipsy man stole my daughter.
JUSTIN – That sounds horrible.  Best of luck finding them. (to Chris)  Let’s get out of here.

(Justin begins to walk.  Chris follows him and catches up.)

JUSTIN – This city is full of people like them.

(A loud buzz and a goofy ringtone plays.  Chris and Justin walk off stage.)
(DANIELA SHEPSIS, 27 – dressed for a wedding, having a refined attitude that’s grounded and ALBERTO GUTIEREZ, 32 – fashionable and flamboyant, walk on stage.)

DANIELA – Thanks for stepping in for Evander at the last moment.  I couldn’t go alone.
ALBERTO – You know what a sucker I am for weddings.  What’s the free meal tonight?
DANIELA – Evander requested the Filet.
ALBERTO – You know I don’t eat meat.  It makes me feel bloated and sluggish.
DANIELA – We’ll see what we can do. (looks at sign) Second floor.  Where’s the elevator?

(The Woman and Boy approach Daniela.)

WOMAN – You look just like her.
DANIELA – Like who?
WOMAN – My daughter.
DANIELA – Well thanks.  (looks around) Is she around?
WOMAN – No.  A gipsy man stole my daughter.
DANIELA – What?
WOMAN – She’s an entertainer.  I watched her.  I was always with her but then there was this time where I wasn’t and he took her.
ALBERTO – Horrible.

(Alberto turns around and begins to laugh.)

WOMAN – Now all I have is the boy.  A huge tragedy.  If you see her, let her know her mother still loves her.  Let’s go sluha.

(Woman and Boy exit stage.)

ALBERTO – What the?
DANIELA – A sudden business engagement.
ALBERTO – What?
DANIELA – That’s what Evander said.  He got an email and suddenly said that a deal was going to fall through, if he didn’t get up to San Francisco immediately.
ALBERTO – Men.  It’s why I can’t stand them.  Can’t keep them seated for more than a minute.
DANIELA – I know.  I can say this to you because you know:  he sometimes checks email when we are… You know?
ALBERTO – During spooning?
DANIELA – No. During. (beat) Anyway, I’ll ask about changing your meal.  (beat – returns to her old train of though) I’m going to get my drink on.  Where’s the elevator?
ALBERTO – It’s over there.

(Daniela and Alberto walk off stage.)

CONTINUE ON TO SCENE TWO  http://wp.me/pvQWH-3x

A loud hot hip lounge.  CENTER STAGE, A BARTENDER, male 26 – who is completely full of himself, stands behind a bar, mixing some drinks.  PEOPLE, 20s and 30s, dressed in trendy clothes surround the bar have conversations mainly about their phones.  NATHALIE, PAOLA and a friend, early 20s, snobby and fashionably dressed, sit at a couch, STAGE LEFT.  Chris and Justin walk in STAGE RIGHT and stand off center.

JUSTIN – This is a great place.  The bartender makes his on Grenadine.
CHRIS – Sounds cool.  I think I’m going to stick to Scotch on the rocks.
JUSTIN – That’s it.  He makes great whisky sours.  He squeezes his own pineapples.
CHRIS – I like Scotch on the rocks.  A simple…

(A loud buzz and a goofy ringtone plays.)

JUSTIN – Hold on.
CHRIS – Turn your ringer off.

(Justin looks at his phone and nods at Chris.)

CHRIS – Who is it?
JUSTIN – A text from Nathalie.  Let me answer her.
CHRIS – Ok.

(Justin turns around and looks at his phone.)

JUSTIN– (types) Got to the club, it’s gnarly.  Where are you? (to Chris)  Cool.  I’m thinking of what I should get.  You should get a whisky.
CHRIS – I’m a Scotch drinker.
JUSTIN – We’re going to have to change that.
CHRIS – I’m not going to wax my eyebrows.

(A LOUD BUZZ with GOOFY and HORRIBLE RINGTONE plays.)
(Nathalie stands up and walks to the bar.)

JUSTIN – One sec.
CHRIS – Are you for real?  Turn off that buzzer.

(Justin looks at his phone.  He nods.)
(Chris walks over to the bar alongside stands along with Nathalie.  They wait for a drink.)

CHRIS – Hey, hey.

(Bartender stands back.  He looks at his phone.  Bartender laughs.)

BARTENDER – Sorry.  I was looking at this YouTube video.
CHRIS – A scotch please.
BARTENDER – Oh.
NATHALIE – (smiles) You should have a Whisky.
CHRIS – (smiles) I like my scotch.
NATHALIE – Hah.  I like a simple guy.
CHRIS – I’m not simple.

(Phone BUZZES).

NATHALIE –Hold on.
BARTENDER – So what would you like?  A single malt, a single grain, a blended malt or just blended?
CHRIS – Are you speaking English?  I think I’ll have just have a Black on the rocks?
NATHALIE – (looks at her phone) Funny.
CHRIS – What’s funny?

(Bartender hands Chris a drink.  A loud buzz.  He looks down at his phone.)

NATHALIE – It’s private.
CHRIS – Okay.  So who you here with?
NATHALIE – I’m with my friends.  We’re celebrating a birthday.
CHRIS – Oh, who’s birthday?

(A loud buzz.)

NATHALIE – Hold on, I’ve got to respond.  (looks at her phone.) But first I’m going to get a drink.  (looks at the Bartender, BARTENDER is distracted by his phone) I’ll just Tweet (begins to type on her phone, completes the message.) Posted. Three, two…

(Bartender walks over.)

BARTENDER – Saw your tweet.  Dying for my famous Sidecar creations?
NATHALIE – Yes I am.
BARTENDER – (picks up a lemon) I’m not serving you this.  I’ll go pick a couple fresh one from the lemon tree in the greenhouse.

(Bartender turns around and walks off stage.)

NATHALIE – He grows his own lemons.

(Justin walks up.  Nathalie and Justin don’t look at each other.)

JUSTIN – Here you are.  All you got was a Scotch on the rocks?
NATHALIE – I told him he should try, wait a sec. (looks at her phone and types aloud) Try the Whisky Smash.  Where are you?

(A LOUD BUZZ with HORRIBLE RINGTONE.)

JUSTIN – Hold on.
CHRIS – Sh!t dude.  That ring.

(Chris looks down at his phone.)

CHRIS – Do you think he has Fresh Raspberries?  I’m at Pretension 515. Send.

(A LOUD BUZZ.)

NATHALIE – (talks to her phone) I’m here too.  (types) Where are you?

(Bartender walks out carrying lemons and raspberries.)

BARTENDER – I got the freshest lemons for your Sidecar.  Hey, where’s you’re guy friend?
NATHALIE – You mean Justin?  I haven’t seen him.

(A LOUD BUZZ with HORRIBLE RINGTONE.  Bartender prepares the drink.  He cuts a lemon and squeezes it into a glass.)

JUSTIN – (types on phone) – I’m here and don’t see you.

(A LOUD BUZZ.)

NATHALIE – (to the phone) – I’m talking with the bartender.

(A LOUD BUZZ with HORRIBLE RINGTONE.)

CHRIS – That fucking ring.  Would you both look up for a second?

(Nathalie and Justin look at Chris and then at each other.)

NATHALIE – Holy shit.  I didn’t see you there.
JUSTIN – Me neither.  Who are you hear with?
NATHALIE – Paola and Ashley.
JUSTIN – Having fun?
NATHALIE – Yes.  They’re looking for some better place to hang out at.

(Paola walks up.)

PAOLA – What’s going on?
NATHALIE – We’re here just talking about how you are looking for something else to do?
PAOLA – It’s not all I’m doing.
BARTENDER – Hey, you’re such a dirty slut.  I can’t believe you send that to me.

(Bartender hands Nathalie a drink.)

NATHALIE – Thanks.  What did she send you?
BARTENDER – That will be twenty-two dollars. (to Chris) Yours is fifteen.  (to everyone) She sent me this topless bathing suit pic one with her covering herself.  (shows it to everyone) How am I supposed to work now?
CHRIS – Wow.
PAOLA – I’m bored.
CHRIS – I’m single.

(Paola looks at her phone.)

PAOLA – No signal right here.  Ahh.

(Phone DOUBLE-BUZZES.)

PAOLA – Hold on.  (pulls out another phone)  It’s good to have a back up.  (looks at her phone)  Ah, I can get us on the list for this hot club over in West Hollywood.
NATHALIE – Hold on.

(Nathalie looks at her phone.)

JUSTIN – Do you want to go out to this club in West Hollywood?
CHRIS – Well…

(Phone BUZZES.)

JUSTIN – I have to turn my ringer.  (interrupts) Hold on. (looks at phone, to Chris) Okay let me order a drink and then we’ll get out of here.

(curtain)

CONTINUE TO SCENE THREE:  http://wp.me/pvQWH-56

This is the Third Scene of the First Act. To start from beginning, hence scene one, click on this link… http://wp.me/pvQWH-4W

A catering bar is UP STAGE RIGHT, with BARTENDER 2, female late 40s, working the bar.  Occasionally wedding guests dressed in semi-formal attire go up order drinks – Bartender 2 makes them and gives them to the guests who walk OFF STAGE back to their seats.  A white table-clothed table is OFF- LEFT CENTER STAGE, with a centerpiece and a placard, “13”. Table 13 is set far away from the wedding party and the dance floor.  Salads are on the table.  STANLEY, 77 and JUDITH, 65, dressed in semi-formal attire but slightly out of style, sits next to two empty seats.  Stanley looks at one placard on the table.  Extras used to fill up the table, should be allowed to move around, ordering drinks, going to take photos of the Wedding Couple (who remain off stage) OR they should be checking their handheld devices.  A WAITER OR WAITRESS should come and clear the table of salads.

JUDITH – What does it mean – check out Michael and Laurie’s twitter page?
STANLEY – I have no idea.  What kind of a wedding is this?  Check out the live video stream from the videographer on Steinbeck-James.com.  If I wanted to watch the wedding on the television I’d have stayed home.
JUDITH – Well, it’s what the kids are doing.
STANLEY – This generation has gone nuts.
JUDITH – Oh come on Stanley.
STANLEY – What happened to a normal wedding card and check?  Now you can only buy things from specific stores.  What do they call those things?  Registration lists.
JUDITH – They’re call registries and it’s great.
STANLEY – You don’t know what you’re talking about.
JUDITH – They give us a list of what they want.  No need to guess or useless gifts.
STANLEY – Judith, are you senile?  I don’t remember receiving any gifts.
JUDITH –Your Uncle Martin and Aunt Helen and The bowling ball flower vase?
STANLEY – (defends the gift) It was pink.
JUDITH – (laughs) Where is it?
STANLEY – (pauses) It’s in my workshop filled with nails. (beat) After forty-seven years of marriage – I’d think you’d have stop picking on my family.

(DANIELA and ALBERTO walk on the stage carrying a table-card.  )

ALBERTO – (points at the table) Table thirteen.
DANIELA – Very far away.  I thought Evander was a good friend.
ALBERTO – Apparently not.  How does he know him?
DANIELA – He dated her in high-school.  They’re still friends.  Where do you want to sit?
ALBERTO – Here.

(Alberto sits down next to Stanley.)
(Daniela sits down next to Alberto.)

ALBERTO – They’re tweeting.

(Alberto pulls out his PDA.)

JUDITH – What did they say?
STANLEY – Shsh… I can’t hear with you interrupting me. (to Alberto) What is that?
ALBERTO – (looks at his phone) It’s a phone.
STANLEY – I know it’s a phone!  What’s a Tweet?
ALBERTO – Sorry… It’s a website where people post comments and others can read them.
STANLEY – (to elderly woman) I told you it had to do with the internets.

(Daniela reaches across and touches Stanley.)

DANIELA – I would love for my dad to have knowledge of technology like you.
STANLEY –Oh you have me mistaken Miss.  I still look for payphones.
DANIELA – (to Alberto) He’s so sweet.  Show him Twitter.  I’m going to check my email.

(Daniela pulls out her phone and types away.)

ALBERTO – (to Stanley – who watches and as if Alberto speaks Mongolian) See, I go to my internet application here and press it – I don’t press any buttons and I type in twitter dot com and I’m already logged in… I take the information on this card, it’s her user name and now I’m on the site.
STANLEY – And what is it?
ALBERTO – They’re messages.  One here – “I’m so happy to be married to Gary” and here’s a response from Gary, “Me-2 You look so beautiful” and see there are many different responses. Click here.  This person tweeted, “I wonder how much they spent on the center pieces?”
JUDITH – (leans in) I can tell you.  They got them at a steal.
ALBERTO – They look rather cheap.
JUDITH – Look at those stems.
ALBERTO – I know they’re practically brown.
JUDITH – They flowers are probably glued on.
STANLEY – (interrupts) enough about the flowers, what’s going on with these tweeters. Why is it so important?
ALBERTO – It’s so we can get some insight into what someone’s thinking.
STANLEY – Does it ever happen?
ALBERTO – Never.  See here… The bride writes:  “I see Daniela but no Evander.  I wonder if everything’s okay.”
DANIELA – What did the slut say? (grabs the phone) What the?

(Daniela stands up.)

ALBERTO – Where you going?
DANIELA – I’m going to give Evander a piece of my mind.
STANLEY – Are you going to tweet it?
DANIELA – In private.

(Daniela walks off STAGE LEFT.)

STANLEY – Where’s your girlfriend going?
ALBERTO – (laughs) She’s not my girlfriend.

(Alberto continues to talk with Stanley and Judith as: )
(CHRIS and JUSTIN walk in STAGE LEFT and look at the audience, as if they’re look at the wedding party.)

CHRIS – And now what?
JUSTIN – Now look at all these attractive women.
CHRIS – How can you tell the boyfriends apart from the dates?
JUSTIN – I ask them.
CHRIS – It doesn’t feel right.  This girl’s been planning this for a while?
JUSTIN – No she hasn’t.  It’s a shotgun – crazy traditional parents.
CHRIS – How do you know?
JUSTIN – It was on Twitter.  Let’s get a drink.

(Chris and Justin walk over to the bar.)

JUSTIN – (to the Bartender) What are you featuring this evening?
BARTENDER – What ever you see here?

(Chris shakes his head.)

JUSTIN – Do you have any Angostura bitters?
BARTENDER – No, I don’t.

(Daniela walks on STAGE LEFT.)

JUSTIN – That’s too bad, I believe that eliminates Gin.  How about Sazerac?

(Chris turns around and nearly bumps into Daniela.)

CHRIS – I’m sorry.
DANIELA – No problem. (smiles) Who are you here with?
CHRIS – I’m here with Justin here.
DANIELA – Costume ball is at the Sheraton Grand Ballroom.  No, I meant who are you here with?
CHRIS – I’m here with Justin.
DANIELA – Bride or the groom.
CHRIS – Oh.  (thinks) I’m with the groom.
DANIELA – That’s good because the bride’s a complete whore.
CHRIS – I love weddings, all the positive sentiment of a funeral – minus the dead guy.
DANIELA – Do you want a drink?
CHRIS – I was going to ask you.  You seem like you need one.

(Daniela and Chris turn to the bar.)

CHRIS – Hey Justin – I made a friend.
DANIELA – Hi Justin.  What’s going on?
JUSTIN – (ignores Daniela) This bar doesn’t have anything.
DANIELA – What do you mean?  (to Bartender 2) Do you have Tequila?
BARTENDER – Yup.
DANIELA – Do you want one?
JUSTIN – (arrogant) By itself: no.  How about Campari?
BARTENDER – You already asked and I said no.
DANIELA – Okay, two Tequila’s up.
JUSTIN – Let’s go somewhere else.  This wedding sucks.

(Chris pulls Justin away from Daniela and the bar.)
(The bartender pours two Tequilas.)

CHRIS – What’s wrong with you?
JUSTIN – I just want a proper drink.
CHRIS – Don’t ruin this for me.
JUSTIN – With her?  Seriously.  Who drinks Tequila at a wedding?
CHRIS – Shss.

(A LOUD BUZZ with horrible ringtone.)

CHRIS – Turn that off – Jesus Christ.
DANIELA – Are you going to drink with me?

(Justin looks at his phone.)

CHRIS – Okay.

(Chris turns and joins Daniela.  They toast.)

DANIELA – Here’s to new friends.

(Daniela and Justin do tequila sunrises.)

DANIELA – That hit the spot.
CHRIS – Do you want another one?
DANIELA – (looks back at the wedding) They just cleared off the salads.  They’re going to be serving dinner soon.  Where are you sitting?
CHRIS – Table?
DANIELA – You’re so cute.  You’re crashing.  (points) Do you know they’ve got cameras all over the place?  It’s being recorded and broadcast on the web.
CHRIS – (looks up and around) What?  They’re streaming this.
DANIELA – (gives a vulgar gesture to an imaginary camera) That’s for last October bitch.
CHRIS – Okay?
DANIELA – I’m sorry.  It’s been a tough day.
CHRIS – Who you here with?
DANIELA – I’m here with my friend Alberto.
CHRIS – Is he your boyfriend?
DANIELA – Alberto (laughs) he’s gay.
CHRIS – (smiles) Good.

(NATHALIE, PAOLA and a friend walk in STAGE RIGHT and up to Chris and Daniela.)

NATHALIE – Here you are?
CHRIS – What happened to your party in Hollywood?

(WAITER or WAITRESS enters to remove salads.)
(Alberto looks around looking for Daniela.  He turns around and spotting Daniela gets up.  He leaves his phone with Stanley.)

NATHALIE – It was next Saturday. (looks at Daniela and then at Chris) So who’s your friend?
CHRIS – Nataley this is (at Daniela) I don’t know your name.
DANIELA – Daniela.
CHRIS – Chris.

(Alberto joins the group.)

ALBERTO – Here you are.  I finished your salad.
DANIELA – I made new friends.
CHRIS – Yes… I’m Chris; this is Nataylee.
NATHALIE – Nah-THA-Lee-Ay.
CHRIS – NaTHALee
NATHALIE – It’s a Nah-THA-Lee-Ay
CHRIS – Whatever.  And this is her friend Paula.
PAOLA – (shakes Alberto’s hand) Paola

(Chris shakes his head)

ALBERTO – Alberto but my friends call me Berto.  Are you wearing Gautier?
PAOLA – Yes.  I love a man with fashion.
ALBERTO – The man is like a breath of refreshing air raining down from the Sierras on a steamy afternoon.  Come, let’s get a drink.

(Alberto and Paola walk to the bar.)

NATHALIE – So where’s Justin?

(A loud BUZZ with horrible ringtone.  Everyone, including the people at the table, turns around and looks at Justin.)

NATHALIE –There he is.

(Nathalie walks over to Justin, but a loud BUZZ again rings out.  She stops halfway and pulls out her phone.)

DANIELA – Are these your friends?
CHRIS – It’s a condition of my parole.
DANIELA – Community service.  Do you want another drink?
CHRIS – I’m kind of hungry.

(Daniela looks over at the empty seats.  Chris follows her eyes.)

DANIELA – Why don’t you join me for dinner?
CHRIS – How about your friend?
DANIELA – He’s a vegetarian – he won’t mind.

(Daniela and Chris walk over and sit down.)

STANLEY – So are you the boyfriend?
CHRIS – No.
JUDITH – What did he say?
STANLEY – He said he’s gay.

(Stanley looks at Alberto’s phone and smiles.)

JUDITH – Poor darling.  Do you think she even knows?
STANLEY – What?
JUDITH – Stanley – what are you looking at? (Judith takes Albert’s phone) Oh Stanley.  This is disgusting.  Naked women Stanley?
STANLEY – Who would have thought that would be on the internets?

(Curtain.)
This concludes what I’m going to post of this story of the Rough Draft. At the time these notes were posted (9/27/08), all three acts of the final play where near completion and maybe shared upon request. Thanks… Read the rest of this entry »

Mandy stands on the doorstep looking down at me.

What she’s doing there? She says nothing as she holds a blank look on her face. She makes no movement standing there in a drizzle looking at me sitting in the car with the engine running.

“Is she here to see me pull away?” She just stands there expressionless saying nothing as her hair mats down from the rain. “Does she want me to be yelled at?” I want her to do something because she’s imposed a standoff. I’ll force her to unhinge this standstill. I’d lower the window and cry out to her, “What do you want?” But by doing this, I’d end up failing at my task. We’re locked into a staring competition on a greater stage – who ever blinks first loses.

I try to find meaning in her motionless. She’s saying something standing there. And these words, in the next song spoke to me in a feminine voice”.

In a manner of speaking
I don’t understand
How love in silence becomes reprimand
But the way I feel about you
Is beyond words

Oh give me the words
Give me the words
That tell me nothing
Oh give me the words
Give me the words
That tell me everything

She stood there. An action toward her, any action, would show her I cared. Getting out of the car, walking to her and slapping her, would say how I care for her, how she’s hurt me, betrayal and eventual forgiveness. And by making this statement in my mind, the epiphany concludes at this moment, my worst fears were now out of my reality. The slap was no different from wrapping my hands around her neck and choking her to death as it would be a perverse show of love and I couldn’t kill what I love.

I couldn’t forgive her and I didn’t love her but we still shared something. We shared motionlessness together waiting for the other to communicate something. Would this be the last thing we share together?

There is motion and the standstill is now broken. The tall athletic man walks around Mandy and is saying something. I can’t hear what he’s saying but he’s pointing at me. I lower the window and turn down the volume down. “What are you saying?”

He looks at me and repeats, “I’m sorry. I’m blocking you.” We’ve been interrupted by some boring suburbanite acting out his biggest dream, pushing the Italian designer coach out of the way and calling a timeout during the crunch time of the big game.

I look at Mandy and back at him and glance into the rearview mirror. The image of a windshield attached with the top of a hood seems planted under my trunk. I confirm with my own eyes that a car is blocking me in by turning around. The athletic man with light brownish hair falls into his car. The sound of an engine turns and the car with a quickness I can’t seem to display gracefully backs away and opens a clear path to the lip of the road where a patch of lighter grey asphalt waits.

Turning back, I see Mandy still looking there at me. The man walks by and apologizes for blocking me. The time out is over. I raise my window and my wet shirt confirms my predicament; I’m stuck to the grey fabric. I’m locked in again. My foot pressing on the break; the car sits in park and running. The path of the asphalts are now open.

What I do next will determine the next months or years of my life. The action of releasing the break and the inactive state of holding tight converge into a heavy nexus. I will let go of the break. My hand feels the pleather gear. My foot will let go of the break. Will I have moved the gear into reverse or left it in park. My foot clutches. I will let go of the break.

Here’s a link to a post  telling you what’s coming up.  http://wp.me/pvQWH-1Q

Reaching the end of summer, I offer a little story looking back to the innocence of youth and love when things were simply simple.  It’s called Summer Serenade, and it is an artistic interpretation of a Greek-Island song by a similar name.  I wrote this on August 15th and edited it on August 18th and 19th, 2009… Dedicated to those who haven’t discovered their roots, may you adopt one or all, to strengthen your future by connecting with the past.

He sits near a suburban side-street.  The same street he has sat near for most of his life, on the rock that sits in Mr. and Mrs. Karins’ property by their white colonial home with aluminum siding.  The same rock where all the neighborhood kids once sat and hung around because it was the perfect rock for it jutted four feet out of the earth and had numerous ledges perfect for sitting.  In those earlier days, the ledge was idyllic for about five kids to comfortably lounge between games of kickball and soccer, while those who lost out on the scramble for the rock sat around on Mr. Karins’ lawn.  In recent years, most of the kids had vacated the spot, not because the rock had become too small or the ledges awkward for sitting, but because of after-school jobs, athletics, video gaming systems, or other rocks in other parts of town or in other towns – bigger cities which made congregating on this rock, a sporadic occurrence for only a few holdouts.

Will sits on top and is one of these holdouts who occupy the rock’s vicinity.  The high-school graduate, he spends his time working a part-time job and traveling to the beach with his buddies.  Jason is one of these buddies, a year behind Will in school, and sits on the lawn.  Considered anti-social and anti-cool except in the neighborhood where his level of comfort, he only ventures away from the neighborhood with Will.  Molly sits having found a short ledge to lay her feet out to which she suns in the burgundy shorts she wears.  She suffers from her parents’ recent spat resulting in their separation and a mother who doesn’t drive her places to meet her friends and other family.

“She wants me to become a doctor,” Molly says.

“Can you write poetry as a doctor,” #1 retorts.

“I bet I could,” she guesses.

“I don’t know,” Jason interjects.  “Most doctors seem bookish and out-of-touch.”  He thinks a little and adds, “Or they try hard not to come off so by being really cutesy.”

I’ve encountered this situation in other youth,
Your depression is routed in a chemical imbalance in your brain,
So you swallow this pill by not biting into it with your tooth
And your dour moods will subsist and you’ll become a train.

Molly and Will laugh.  “That was a terrible poem.”

“What does ‘become a train’ actually mean,” Will asks.

“I don’t know,” Jason shakes his head as Molly gives him a playful tap on his shoulder.

“Anyway, my mom now does three things.  She smokes cigarettes, drinks wine and insists how I learn subjects like Chemistry, Biology and Physics.  And school’s been out for a week.”

Will pops in with, “I didn’t know your mother smoked?”

“At least you can learn subjects like Anatomy?”

“If only.  She says, ‘Imani,’ that’s what she calls me, ‘Men are the bane of humanity.  I want you to become an independent woman never to rely on a man.’”

“Wow, she’s jaded.”

“Very much so, but it’s a problem.  She said, ‘I don’t want you to be like the other girls, or be like me when I was your age, dreaming about boys and what it would feel like on our wedding day.  It’s highly overrated and who you think is your Prince Charming today will only find a younger woman tomorrow to sell another Camelot too.’”

“What’s a Camelot?”

“I don’t know,” Molly responds.

“I don’t know either,” Jason says sitting on the grass picking it.

“Hey down there… Don’t pick grass from only one spot.  Pick evenly and save me the trouble of paying you to mow,” a man’s voice calls out.

“Mr. Karins.  They’ve been together thirty seven years.  I wonder how he does it.”

“I don’t know,” Jason says picking grass from the same spot.

“Do you girls dream of weddings and princes?”

Molly looks inquisitively at Will through her green eyes and underneath her dark brown hair.  “I don’t know what girls do.  I don’t necessarily think of specific guys.  I guess I do think of being a bride, but I think it’s like playing house as a kid.  It’s nothing serious.”  She looks at Will and Jason.  “But all of this has me thinking.”

“What of?”

“Finding my Prince Charming and proving her wrong,” Molly adds.

Her phone buzzes.  She answers, “Hi,” she pauses listening to her mother’s response.  “Yes mom.  I’m just across the street.  Hanging out.  With and Jason.”  Her face becomes sullen.  “Why is it all of a sudden problem?  I’m just hanging out.”  She pauses becoming obstinate.  “Whatever.”  She hangs up the phone.

Across the street, the window lowers from her house and an angry loud woman’s voice calls, “Imani!  Get in here.  It’s time to do your homework!”

“Imani?”

“Imani, it’s the traditional name she wanted to give me.”

“Imani!”

Molly stands pressing her pants, looks across at Will and says, “She’s really an embarrassment.  ‘Crazy Syrian’ that’s what my dad calls her.  I miss him.  Once a month – that’s all they say I can see him.  Anyway, I’m going in before she gets really psycho.  She’ll come out here and drag me in. She will.”

“I won’t let that happen.  I won’t.

“I know you wouldn’t,” Molly slaps Will’s leg as turns to go in, “and that’s why I’m going in.”

“I’m here,” Will points at himself.  “I’m also here,” he points to his phone.  “I’m also over there,” he says ceremoniously pointing to his house which is on the next street over and hidden from view by two houses and trees.  “If you need any help.”

“And I’m right next door,” Jason adds.

“Like you’d do something?  If you get into any trouble, Jason will pee himself and worry for you.”  They all exchange glances and seeing Jason has withdrawn a little Will adds, “Dude, you’re just sensitive and I only joke with you because I like you.”  Will thinks as Molly has begun to walk away, “Are you going to the party at The Falls, on the fourth?”

She stops, but a voice calls out…”Imani” and a series of other foreign phrases.

“I’m coming” she yells out toward her mother.  Briefly turning back, she says, “I don’t think so.  I have to go.”  Moll walks across the empty sun bleached asphalt leaving the partly sunny skies of the world for an uncertain home experience.

July 3rd arrives, and it’s been more than a week that Will and Jason have last seen or heard of Molly.  Driving Will’s mom’s brown Buick, Will says, “I’ve called her a couple of times, sent her a couple of texts and nothing.”

“Do you think she’s avoiding you? Maybe she’s avoiding you.”

“If she is, she’s doing a good job.  When I called her today, her phone was disconnected.”

“When I liked Sarah Simmons, she disconnected her phone because of me.”

“It’s because you called her some twenty-five times and each time you left her voicemail.”  Will turns the car into the BurgerJoint parking lot.

“You exaggerate.  I called her twenty-three times and left her eighteen messages.  But I had reasons.”

Will pulls his Mom’s Buick into a parking spot.  “I’m not going to tell you this eighteen times, call a girl once, if she likes you, she’ll call you back.

“And how many times have you called or texted Molly this week.”

“She’s the exception to the rule.”

They walk in through the stainless steel glass doors.  Will sees a group of college guys sitting down at a white wooden-booth in the corner.  “That’s Molly’s cousin, Aaron.  I’m going to say what’s up.”

“I’m kind of hungry.  I’m going to grab some fries.”

Will walks over and says hi to everyone, “Hey, what’s up.”  Everyone acknowledges Will.  “You guys coming out to the party at The Falls.”

“Wouldn’t miss the old Falls,” one of the guys says.

Another friend adds, “It’s the last time before they bulldoze the place.”

Will contemplates whether to cut through the BS really quickly or to continue to pursue a superfluous conversation about capitalist America’s impact on capitalist youth who would be figure out who would be buying booze, weed and evading the police on the cheap.  “Hey Aaron, Do you think your cousin Molly is going?”

Aaron looks back at Will, with the same green eyes Molly has but with pinkish skin and blond hair.  “I don’t know.”

“What’s going on?”

“Well coming back from college…”

“You’re going to Penn State?

“Yah.  So I’m back for almost six weeks and it was really tough for me to meet up with my cousin.  It was weird.”

“Totally.”

“Finally, last weekend my mother and I had to go to their house and pound on the door for fifteen minutes before Molly’s mom would open the door.”

“What’s going on there?”

Aaron looks inside himself for something thoughtful, “The Crazy Syrian is insane.  It’s like her Dad’s mistake is something everyone else has to pay for.  To tell you the truth, I think he did right.”

“And how is she?”

“She’s a prisoner.  Forced to read for hours in her room or in her kitchen under the Crazy Bitch’s supervision.  She disconnected her phone, her TV and even the Internet.  Now I can’t even chat with her by G-chat or Skype.  It blows.  My mother says she has her daughter working in the attic sorting through old stuff – throwing my uncle’s stuff away.”

Jason carrying a large order of fries resting in a French Fry Protector Pouch on a tray sits on a nearby table.

“You still hanging out with the Faucet,” one of Aaron’s friends call to Jason, “Don’t get upset and pee on yourself.”

Will looks to the friend, “You think you graduate school and knock it off”.  He turns to steal a fry.  “These are wicked good fries.”

July 4th and the town’s main street North Main Street, usually a congestion of automobiles choking with the four lanes of traffic and parallel parking enthusiasts, is blocked off for the annual parade routing up the main street and turning down Grant Avenue towards town’s lake – the penultimate location for the annual fireworks display.  The entire town and a scattering of people from nearby towns have mainly jockeyed each other for a position along the parade route and now patiently behind the yellow rope which is tied to the stainless steel streetlights.

The corner of Main and Grant Avenue, an elevated position and prime location for watching both a majority of the parade route and the lake downhill, is convenient to Will and Jason’s neighborhood and it’s where Will, along with all the kids from the neighborhood watch the parade since they had to be chaperoned by their parents.  This is, in addition to a parade, the scene of a reunion of everyone who would grew up or live around the rock at the Karins’ house.  The kids who would hang out with Will and Jason have returned having brought their new friends.  One of these new friend’s friend is Kristen, a tall blond who was from another part of town but had gone to an all-girl Catholic high school, instead of the public one.

“So where are you going to school next year,” she asks of Will.

“Boston College.”

“I hear they have crazy parties there, not like the eternal bore-fests we have.”

“I never heard of BC as being a big party school.”

“Well, it will be when we come up to visit,” she asserts.  “Boston is so far away.”

“It’s only a forty minute drive.  It’s really close.”

Jason listening pops in with, “I don’t know what I’m going to do without you in school.  I think I’ll visit you every weekend and stay with you during school vacation.”

“Visit whenever you want.”

“I like college guys.  They’re so mature,” Kristin brushes Will’s arm who steps back.

At that moment, Will sees from a distance, a mother and daughter walking up Grant Ave from the direction of their neighborhood.

“Hey is that?”

Jason responds, “Mister Karins?”

Will changes focus and notices the seventy-three year old landlord of the rock.

Mr. Karins stands in front of Will grey-haired, grey checked pants looking all the part of a man living his golden years.  “Hello kids.”

“Hey Mister Karins.  Walk up here.”

“Of course.”

“Where is the Misses?”

“At home watching the Pops.  She’s bored with this small town.  When are you off to BC Will?”

Will doesn’t hear him but looks off at the approaching couple.

“Did you hear me?”  Mr. Karin turns around and checks out what Will is looking at.

“Sorry.  What did you ask me?”

Mr. Karin sees Molly wearing a simple blue-pleated skirt with two blue long straps which would look like suspenders, a white blouse and a red and white throw around her neck and shoulders.  “Ah… She’s turning into quite a woman.”

Kristin turns, “Who are you talking about?  Her?”

Jason interjects, “Yes that’s Molly.”

“She’s really pretty.  Is that you’re girlfriend,” Kristin asks Will.

“No.  She’s just a friend.”

“Anyway kids, I’m going to take off.  I’ll catch you later and whenever you want Jason, my lawn requires another cutting.”

Mister Karins walks off as Kristin continues.  “I don’t think she’s just a friend.  I think you like her.  I know when a guy likes a girl and you like her.  So what’s the problem?”

Will doesn’t respond.

“She doesn’t like you?”

“No, I really don’t know if she likes me or not.”

“So you do like her.”  Kristin hears Will’s silence.  “Well, I can help you get her to like you.  We just have to make her jealous.”

“You guys should just start kissing.”

“No.”

“That would totally work.”

“It worked on TV.”  Jason adds in a television announcer’s voice.  “And if I order now, I’d also get Molly to make out with me.”

Kristin looks at Jason weirdly, “That’s not what I had in mind.”

“What would be gained at Molly making out with you?  Anyway, here they come so shut up.”

At that moment, the soon-not-to-be-Mrs. Griffith walks clear of Will, Jason, Kristin and all the neighborhood connections.  Molly follows her mother’s lead.

Will steps into their path, “Hi Mrs. Griffith, if that’s what I should call you?  Hi Molly.”

Molly smiles and says hi.  Mrs. Griffith responds, “That will work until the court-date in two weeks, then my name will revert to my maiden Bathmani.”  She turns to her daughter, “if you love me, you too will change your name back to Bathmani as well and never change it again.”

Molly looks down.

Kristin steps into the picture, “Hi, I’m Kristin.  Are you getting amped for the firework show?  I read they’re going to have a new color.  Pink.”

“That’s great.”  Miz-Soon-To-Be-Bathmani interjects, “But I’m really here to watch the marching bands.”

Jason then adds – having ghosted behind Kristin into the conversation, “Did you know there’s going to be a marching band all the way from Southern Maine?”

“No, I didn’t, but sounds interesting,” Molly’s Mom responds disaffectedly.  At that moment, the motorcycle cops slowly overtake the parade route giving everyone the signal the parade is going to start.  “Which reminds me, we’ve got to find our spot.  Enjoy the parade William.”  With that the mother and daughter turn their backs to Will and Kristin and Jason walked in.

“That was weird,” Kristin interjected.  “But I didn’t know this one was a comedian.”

Jason replies plainly, “But there is a band from Maine this year.”

Will’s brain attempts to connect with the conversation at hand and Jason’s dry sense of humor, but his eyes wanders to watching Molly’s dejected backside sauntering down the street.  “I don’t know what just happened.”

“It wasn’t even her,” Jason interjects capturing Will’s attention.

Mrs. Griffith head attempts to figure out the perfect viewing location which was free from distraction.  For her, distractions were everything and anything reminding her of a failed past reality, to include her daughter’s friends, the neighborhood they lived in and the mistakes she had made in her youth.  When she feels she has gained enough separation from them, she says to Molly, “It’s perfect for a distraction-free parade,” and stops turning toward the double-yellow lines.

Molly senses her mom’s state of security and quickly turns looking back at Will, who appears to have sensed her gaze and is looking back at her.

Will looks at her and the moment expands in time and becomes simultaneously something present and holding itself in the present-not-too-distant-past.  In that look, Molly’s mother, Mister Karins who is standing next to Molly’s Mother, Will’s own friends disappear along with the other spectators, the storefronts lining the street, the red-white and blue banners on the light posts and the light-posts themselves.  Everything else slowly vanishes from sight until the entire world is reduced to a vacuum of white with Molly standing alone in it.  In this moment, Jason finds himself close to Molly, feeling her soft body – unlike he had ever felt, with his hands wrapped around her waste seeing her, inhaling her and hearing her breath and seeing her green eyes looking back.  In those eyes, he realizes her eyes aren’t green but a combination of blacks and whites, blues and yellows or yellows and cyans, reds, blues and reds, all swimming around to give the appearance of green.  He knows her.  He loves her.

Still in this moment, deep inside of her, he senses something he never expected from such a connection.  It was something percolating and emanating from the bottom-less pit of her soul coming back at him, up from a depth and looking at him, the way Adam must have felt when Eve had taken a bite from the first Red Delicious Apple.  He felt a connection with another woman through a glance which grew in itself he felt good with this initially.  She was inside of him, beneath his brown eyes piercing his soul and was seeing things even he couldn’t understand.  He was filled with questions and maybe by seeing them, she would be able to help him answer some of these questions.

Is this for real?  Can two people connect with just a glance?  Is it possible for love to be formed in these moments?  A moment and a look brought so many questions and so much depth that he was began to feel overwhelmed by the weight of this moment.  He felt that together they would be able to handle this and so the moment continued and his look gained greater clarity – as if truth would be discovered.  And in the clarity of her eyes, he saw something he never expected – himself.

Seeing himself, he understood if she looked long enough, she too would only see herself and what he had felt just moments earlier was now replaced with the fact they’d always be distinct from each other.  Was this too much?  Everything exploded and the realization, “A set of Jumping Jacks are exploding at my feet.  He jumps as some of his friends laugh, except for Jason.

The parade and fireworks display went off, like they would, in any small New England suburban town.  The parade comprised the same marching bands playing the same marching songs; however this year there was a marching band from Southern Vermont and not Maine – as Jason joked, playing a marching band version of Moonlight in Vermont.  The fireworks lasted fifteen minutes and typical except for the addition of the color pink to which some remarked how lovely the pink.

And now away from the town center and up a small brook which fell into the opposite side of the town lake exists The Falls.  The location where the town brook cascades three feet over a granite rock ledge and which for hundreds of years teenagers have come to escape the rules of their parents – who had once themselves escaped the authorities by ignoring a freckled sign alerting everyone of how trespassing results in the police taking notice.  A newer sign, far larger in size, signals the plans to replace the woods on property consisting of maple trees and other trees that changed colors in the autumn which surround the natural waterfall, with a multiplex of concrete structures in the form of condominiums, retail stores and office spaces centering around a manicured and manipulated waterfall lined in concrete.  This would be something grand if not for the same Boston architectural firm having recently created exact identical replicas of similar concrete structures and courtyards throughout Central and Southern New England.

About twenty feet away from the Falls, where many kids are hanging out, Jason looks down at Will who had been sitting by himself.“Construction begins next week?  What am I going to do when this place is gone?”

“You never come here.  I bet this is the first time you’ve been here.”

“You should see this place during the day.”

“You come here during the day?”  Will looks at Jason and smiles, “you always surprise me.  Like when you told me how you play accordion.  I’ve known you my entire life and I think we spend every waking hour together and I’ve never seen you play.”

“We don’t hang out as much as you think and you’re not going to make fun of me.”  Jason takes a sip of beer, wincing as he the Natty Light down his down his throat.  “How do adults drink this sh!t?”

“Last week had you told me I’d be in love: I’d have given you the face you just made with that beer.  Now it feels really natural.  It’s real.”

“We’ve known her all her life.  Have you ever thought why all of a sudden you’re in love with her?”

“I know it’s weird.  I never knew I loved her.  Or maybe I knew it and just didn’t realize it?”

“And you don’t think it’s because you like a challenge?”

“A challenge?  I had a connection.”

“Every guy is attracted to a girl he is somehow obstructed from having.  Like when I liked Sarah, it was the fact that she didn’t answer the phone that made me like her even more.”

“You’ve never even had a girlfriend.”

Jason withers with this reprimand.

“I wish I could do something for her.”

Jason laughs.

“What?”

“You could serenade her,” Jason offers jokingly.

“I could?” Will thinks.  “I could.  Couldn’t I?”  He thinks some more.  “There’s only one problem.  I don’t play an instrument.”

“You could sing A Capella.”

“I don’t know Mexican, but you play the accordion.

“No. No. No.”

In the darkness of the woods, Kristin’s voice calls out, “What are you guys doing so far away from everyone?”

Kristin and Will wait across the street for Jason.

“I can’t wait to see you serenade this girl.  It’s so romantic.”

“I just hope he doesn’t wake up his mother.  He does and my plans are ruined.  I’ll never forgive him.”

Moments later, Jason silently comes out of his house carrying his accordion strapped to his chest.  He toes across the lawn.

“What the hell took you so long?”

“My dad.”

“What you saw your dad.  What did you tell him?”

“The truth.”

“And why would you do that?”

“I’m carrying my accordion down the stairs just after midnight.  What else should I tell him?”

“And what did he say?”

“He said I was a good friend for helping you out and a man for,” he stopped.

“For what?  How are YOU a man?”

Jason contemplates not telling his friend, but he resents a lot of the continuous digs.  “He said, ‘Jason you’re a man for not telling Will how crazy he is and not talking him out of it.’”

Will looked in shock at the diss and turned seeing Kristin laughing, ‘Hey, that’s not funny.”

Kristin stops laughing, “No it was funny.  It’s so true.”

“He further said, “A man is only a man when he learns to keep his mouth shut – like I have with your mother.’”

Will looks back at Jason who starts laughing and it is in this cocktail of love, drunkenness and delirium that Will broke out in laughter.  He composes himself and turns looking across the street at Molly’s house, “What should we do?”

“Let’s take the long way.”

They march with a passion unseen in the earlier parade on a half-hazard route lacking observers they are aware of, or floats.  Jason plays the keys on the accordion as Kristin and Will sing out of key to both Standards and pop hits.  When they find themselves behind Molly’s house, they trespass through the grey house’s backyard and through a gap of fences into Molly’s backyard.  When they find themselves underneath Molly’s window, the darkness of the second story window was imposing.

It‘s here in this gap, Kristin silently smiles to Jason, “You’re really good with that thing?”

“Seriously?”

“I like guys who play instruments.”

“Now what,” asks Will.

“Hello kids,” a man’s voice whispers authoritatively.

Everyone jumps at Mister Karin’s sudden interference.

“How did you get in here,” Jason asks.

“Through the front gate,” he looks back at the threesome.

“OK.  This is weird,” Will chimes in.  “What are you doing here?”

“I was going to ask the same question.  I figured you children were up to some kind of excitement.”  Mister Karins reviews the situation.  “A moonlight serenade.”  He looks at the blank responses.  “Actually, I did this once myself.”

“With Mrs. Karins?”

Mister Karins pauses and thinks about the time he pretended to serenade the Misses, but how it was something he did with another girl he was madly in love with, who happened to be madly in love too – just with a quarterback from another town’s high school football team.  So for simplicity sake he lies, “yes.  That’s how the Misses and I ended up together.”

Looking back at Jason, Will asks, “So what do we do?  Or Should I ask you instead Mister Karins?”

Jason responds, “I’ll just play a standard tune and you sing.”

“What should I sing?”

Moonlight Serenade,” Mister Karins chimes in.  “I love that one.  ‘My love, do you know.  That your eyes are like stars brightly beaming?  I bring you, and I sing you a moonlight serenade.’

Will responds, “I don’t know that one.”

“Glenn Miller.”

“Yes.  I never knew you liked music.”

“I inherited all my grandpa’s albums after he died.”

“You guys can catch up on what other obscure CDs you own.  What else can you play?”

“There records. LPs.  I’ll make up a tune and you make up the lyrics.  Something about how you feel about her?”

“Okay.”

The air compresses out of the accordion and Jason began playing a simple tune, and an accordion, even played well, would sound like an air-raid siren going off in a war-zone.  Jason plays and watches Will standing there and begins to sense time standing still.  He looks at Will suggesting, “start singing” with a fear that dogs would be unleashed upon them and somehow he’d fail to escape them or the police because he’d feel compelled to help Mister Karins climb over the fence.  “Sing”.

Finally Will sings these lyrics:

“When you looked at me, the world stood still.
Let me water your mom with wine.
She’ll pass out and then I’ll come up to kiss you.
She’ll be asleep and I’ll be there for comfort.
Your meddling mother passed out from moonshine.”

Upon Will’s final stanza, Jason wraps up the song.

The one romantic, the one accomplice and the two witnesses to make it official all look up at the window remaining in the dark.

“Nothing?”

“Nothing.”

“Is that her room,” Kristin asks pointing out another window with which light was on.

“That’s the…” Mister Karin attempts to warn but is suddenly interrupted by the backdoor to the back-porch opens.  A figure appears out of the light, “Would you get out of here before I call the cops.”

They look at each other.  Will wants to say something more, something romantic such as, “You can’t keep her away from me for ever.”  But like the moment earlier in the night, another reality takes over and it makes him skeptical of whether or not Molly likes him in return.  He looks up at her window looking for some sign that she has heard him and wants him.  He chooses a conservative route saying, “I don’t know.  Let’s go back to my house – except for you.  My mom would find that kind of odd.”

They all turn and begin to walk quickly through the front gate.

“I’d be swooning,” Kristin said, “Even with the lame lyrics, ‘I’ll water your mom with wine… your meddling mother passed out from moonshine.”

Will shakes his head in doubt.

Turning to Jason, Kristin asks, “So do you play any other instruments?  I had three years of flute lessons.”

This article contains references to a couple of known and unknown serenades depending on the reader.  First, this article is based off a traditional Greek Island serenade, “Patinada” (Ta Matia Sou Ta Omorpha) or” Serenade”  (Your Beautiful Eyes) which I acknowledge taking the structure and creating a story from it.  Here is a link to the YouTube audio clip, of the version sung by the Titan singer, Yiannis Parios http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V7lLN8PO3ro&feature=PlayList&p=AEAD52A59C8AF703&index=5 … And here are my amateur translated lyrics.

Curse your mother, who made you a seamstress,
and overworks you in sowing to fix a skirt.

Oh.
Your eyes those beautiful eyes.
That look, that looks down.
Oh, which look down.
When they turn and see me.
Deep into my heart,
Deep in my heart, they tear me.

Your meddling mother I will water with wine.
So she’ll faint, so she’ll be asleep, so I will come to kiss you. (2)
Your meddling mother I will water with wine.

I also referenced a marching band playing Moonlight in Vermont at July 4th Parade.  To tell you the truth, I’ve never actually heard a marching band play the song since I last went to a parade as a kid.  If there is a marching band playing the song, I’ll certainly be to check out that parade.  Here is a link to Willie Nelson on lastfm.com http://www.last.fm/music/Willie+Nelson/_/Moonlight+In+Vermont

Finally, Mister Karins references Moonlight Serenade by Glenn Miller.  Here is a YouTube audio clip of Frank Sinatra singing it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nAMwla1YT0Y&feature=related (I really doubt this was the guy’s only tribute to Frank Sinatra.  Sinatra fans are crazy, but this is a great song).  

Hi,  for those of you new to my blog, get yourself caught up with my recent short story before I release the thrilling conclusion of “Not This Saturday”, September 9th.   This is a story about a guy who accidentally takes his new girlfriend to his aunt’s swingers party and how his world unravels.  (Note that earlier portions of the story are sexually graphic and are intended for a young adult audience.)
Here is the link for Stage 1:

http://theodoreadonis.wordpress.com/2009/06/07/not-this-saturday-chapter-1/

Enjoy,

Teddy.

This one’s going to sit heavy.  In talking with some friends, it became obvious that some statement was necessary regarding the blog, the content and limiting any bizarre action that someone could take up against me.  It’s all contained here and to sum it up, simply because the content is free, doesn’t mean the property is free for the taking or can be adapted for your use. Simply because you have the same name as a character doesn’t mean it’s you. Simply because you clicked on a link and got a virus, doesn’t mean I wanted that too happen. Simply because the content is available to everyone, doesn’t mean the content is intended for everyone (Personally, I wouldn’t want my almost four year old niece to learn sentence structure from “Not This Saturday” or try to gleam what my personal choices are). Discretion is advised – even when reading these Terms of Use.

http://theodoreadonis.wordpress.com/2009/08/21/blogs-terms-of-use-8212009/

I’m going to be releasing a new short story soon… so these terms will not be at the top of my blog. T

Hi… I’m Theodore A. Kechris, aka Theodore Adonis, referred to as “I” and “Me”, and YOU are the reader, referred to as “You”.  The following is the Terms and Conditions of Use which apply to You when You view, access or otherwise use the Blog located at www.theodoreadonis.wordpress.com, referred to as “The Blog” of which the content I own but the website is owned by WordPress.  These Terms of Use are not meant to supersede those of WordPress located at: http://en.wordpress.com/tos/

In March, I decided to begin writing and publishing this Blog containing original works of fiction for the purpose of entertaining readers and in the hopes of establishing my lucrative opportunities in writing and developing fiction, including compilations (collections of short-story), screenplays, novels, spoken word recordings, stage-plays, street reenactments…  The Blog contains original works of fiction that I write, edit and publish in real time- meaning that at the time of publication the materials MAY NOT be registered with the US Copyright Office. Still:

UNAUTHORIZED COPYING, REPRODUCTION, REPUBLISHING, UPLOADING, POSTING, TRANSMITTING OR DUPLICATING OF ANY OF THE MATERIAL IS PROHIBITED. You may download any downloadable materials displayed on the Blog only for personal, noncommercial and informational purposes, provided that the documents are not modified, proper references are included and your reader is provided the easiest access to the source including links.

Examples would provisionally include,

  1. You copying a single post into an electronic file (.txt, .doc, RTF, HTML or PDF document) and viewing it or printing to view, for your future offline personal use – so long as you include (a.) the title of the work, (b.) my name and (c.) the Blog address, “www.theodoreadonis.wordpress.com”at the top of the first page and the bottom of the last page – if the post prints on two pages.  If your printed materials includes these items, You may photocopy up to four additional copies for your families or friends, each fastened by a staple.
  2. You combining multiple posts into a single electronic file (.txt, .doc, RTF, HTML or PDF document) and viewing it, or printing to view, for your future offline personal use – if you include (a.)my name (b.)the blog address,  www.theodoreadonis.wordpress.com at the top of the first page and bottom of the last page AND the title of each respective post and the Blog address above the body of the corresponding post material.
  3. You may email your families and friends links to my blog with an excerpt not to exceed one hundred words and conserve the paper.

The permissions does NOT extend to distributing the Blog materials through electronic file attachments or any other electronic method, except when the action is between two email addresses You have sole access to (i.e. personal and work email addresses).

I reserve the right to register a story or compilation of my materials with the US Copyright Office at any time and may not disclose the work having registration pending or having been registered since the post’s original publication date.  My failure to notify the reader, does not limit any legal course of action that I could take under the applicable federal or state laws, and it’s incumbent upon You to understand these laws.

FICTIONAL WORK NOTIFICATION

Let Me also write that in going about creating fiction, what seems to work the best is to pull directly from my life, drawing from the people, places and situations that I’ve experienced.  Still, these are works of fiction and any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.  If You believe that You  resemble a character, You have the same name or You don’t like the manners as the character with a similar name, I promise not to tell anyone – if You don’t and I promise to deny it – if asked.

At times, The Blog references “public figures” in fiction which are known to You.  The characterization of these individuals whether it’s in a character’s dream, in the character’s reality, or in the narrative are for satirical and humor value only and are not intended to slander or insult. My aim is to amuse and poke fun, not publish libel.  I would be willing to have a conversation at altering these references upon request by those individuals or the individuals’ representatives.

I at times write notes.  They are based on my own studies, research and personal experience for informing and entertaining.

LINKS…

At times, I reference links for You to read, listen or watch for informational purposes and/or to enhance the experience.  The links are provided solely as a courtesy to my Blog visitors.  I do not control the linked sites or the materials, information, goods or services available or contained on these linked sites. I am not responsible for and do not endorse or warrant in any way any materials, information, goods or services available through such linked sites or any privacy or other practices of such sites. If You decide to access any of the linked sites, You are responsible for taking precautions as necessary to protect yourself and your computer systems from viruses, worms, Trojan horses, and other harmful or destructive content.I reserve the right to terminate any link at any time.

PRIVACY POLICY

Should You choose to provide feedback or comments through the WordPress comment box or another method, not limited to those listed below, please understand that I value your privacy.  I will not share any of your information (i.e. Full Names, Full Addresses – physical, mailing, emailing, Telephone Number or other contact information, Company Name, Business or Organization) with individuals other than those associated with The Blog or individuals required to carry out operations pursuant to the daily business of this Blog, or myself.  I reserve the right to use your comments in a future blog using your first name and either with your location and/or the medium from which You made the comment.

Should you choose to inquire additional information or have a question on a subject contained within the Blog’s Terms of Use, these contacts will be kept expressly private, unless agreed upon by both You and I.

I reserve the right to make veiled references that may in some way violate the above Privacy Policy should 1.  your inquiry or notice inhibits Me from posting materials on this Blog. 2. The repeated baseless contacts become noteworthy of publication.

USE OF COPYRIGHT INFORMATION

Should You feel that I have used your material incorrectly, according to either Federal or State law, Your site’s Terms of Use, or any other reason, please send Me the following:

A – Identification of the copyright work claimed to have been infringed, or if multiple works are covered by a single notification – a list of such works.

B – Identification of the claimed infringed material and information reasonably sufficient to allow Me to locate the information on the Blog.

C – Information reasonably to permit Me to contact You, such as a mailing address, telephone number and, if available, e-mail address.

D – A statement that You have a good faith belief that the disputed use is not authorized by the copyright owner, it’s agent or the law AND that You, made under the penalty of perjury, that the information above is accurate and that You are the copyright owner or authorized to act on the copyright owner’s behalf.

E – Your physical or electronic signature.

Please provide Me with a notice that includes that includes all of the above enumerated information (“Notice of Infringement”) and mail it to:

Theodore Kechris
PO Box 532
Boston MA 02117-0532

OR Send Me a note in an email with any applicable information that will allow Me to respond or act, to:  teddykechris@gmail.com

COMMERCIAL USE OF THIS BLOG

BUT WAIT – If You intend to use the Blog Materials for COMMERCIAL USE You should know:

I expressively prohibit the use of this Blog for those purposes without the express written permission of Theodore A. Kechris, aka Theodore Adonis.  This includes the materials, screen-shots, printed materials, reproduction, copying or redistribution of materials for, or portions of these materials.  Any use, reproduction, or distribution of material on this Blog which constitutes the personal information, property, or photograph or other depiction of myself may also be subject to state and federal privacy and other laws requiring my further consent.

In order to obtain permission to copy portions of this Blog for COMMERCIAL USE, please send email to:  TeddyKechris@gmail.com and provide the following information in the body of the email:

* the content You wish to use;
* where, when and how it will be used (for example, a seminar, newsletter or news article);
* where and how copies will be distributed and to what audience;
* how many copies will be produced and distributed;
* what other materials will be associated with My content; and
* your name, title, company, address, email address and phone number.

I’ll evaluate and respond to your request as soon as possible. I reserve the right to refuse permission to copy, distribute, broadcast, or publish any of my copyrighted material, including text and images on the Blog.  My failure to respond within a certain amount of time should not be construed as giving permission.

ACTIONS YOU ARE PROHIBITED FROM TAKING:

You agree not to interrupt, or attempt to interrupt, the operation of the Blog in any way. Unauthorized use or modification of any information stored on the Blog may result in criminal and/or civil prosecution under Federal, State and local law. You may not use the Blog for anything other than a lawful and legitimate purpose. You agree not to use the Blog to carry out any unauthorized alteration of any data or information on the Blog or to conduct any activity that infringes on the copyright, patent, trademark, service mark or other rights of any person or entity. You shall not restrict or inhibit any other user from using and enjoying any service conducted on the Blog.

The Blog is not intended for use by anyone under the age of 14, and minors, based on your legal jurisdiction, should obtain parental approval before continuing to view this Blog. I reserve the right to limit, remove your comments, or work with WordPress to deny your access to the Blog, or take other appropriate action if You violate any provision of these Terms and Conditions of Use or if You conduct any activity that violates the rights of any person or entity, or which I in my sole discretion deem unlawful, offensive, threatening, abusive or potentially harmful or malicious.

MODIFICATION OF THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS.

I reserve the right to revise these Terms at any time by updating this posting or creating another post.  Your continued use of the Blog constitutes your agreement to comply with such revisions, so You should visit this page from time to time, create flashcards and bone up on the various sections.

EMAIL TO PROVIDE NOTICE:

Basically, I’d prefer You communicate and make requests through email; except for actual legal notices, where the notice to Me is required by contract, or any federal, state or local laws, rules or regulations.

LIMITATION OF DAMAGES:

(a) I expressly disclaim all liability for any viruses or other contamination of your computer system or other device used to access this Blog as a result of your use of this Blog and expressly disclaims all liability for actions taken or not taken based on any or all of the contents of this Blog. THE BLOG IS PROVIDED “AS IS”, WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, TITLE, SECURITY, ACCURACY AND NON-INFRINGEMENT. WITHOUT LIMITING THE FOREGOING, SHEPPARD MULLIN MAKES NO WARRANTY OR REPRESENTATION, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, THAT ACCESS TO OR OPERATION OF THE BLOG WILL BE UNINTERRUPTED OR ERROR FREE.

(b) USE OF THE BLOG IS AT YOUR OWN RISK. YOU ASSUME FULL RESPONSIBILITY AND RISK OF LOSS RESULTING FROM YOUR DOWNLOADING AND/OR USE OF FILES, INFORMATION, OTHER COMMUNICATIONS, CONTENT OR OTHER MATERIAL (INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, SOFTWARE) ACCESSED THROUGH OR OBTAINED BY MEANS OF THE BLOG.

Indemnification. You agree to indemnify and hold Me harmless, my contractors, and its licensors, and their respective directors, officers, employees and agents from and against any and all claims and expenses, including attorneys’ fees, arising out of your use of the Blog, including but not limited to your violation of this Agreement.

APPLICABLE LAWS – VENUE

Miscellaneous. This Agreement constitutes the entire agreement between Me and You concerning the subject matter hereof, and they may only be modified by a written amendment signed by an authorized executive of Me, or by the posting by Me of a revised version. While my mailing address is in Massachusetts, I currently reside and operate this Blog from an international coffee-chain store in California and make no representations that materials in the Blog are appropriate or available for use in other locations. The display of the Blog alone does not subject Me to any specific jurisdiction. Access to the Blog from any territory where the content is illegal is prohibited. If You choose to access the Blog from other locations, You do so at your own risk and are solely responsible for compliance with any and all applicable laws, rules and regulations. You may not use or export any of the Blog materials in violation of U.S. export laws and regulations. Any claim related to the use of the Blog or to the Blog materials shall be governed by, construed and enforced in accordance with the laws of the State of California as applied to agreements made and to be performed entirely therein, and the proper venue for any disputes arising out of or relating to any of the same will be the state and federal courts located in Los Angeles County, California. Except for claims for injunctive or equitable relief or claims regarding intellectual property rights (which may be brought in any competent court without the posting of a bond), any dispute arising under this Agreement shall be finally settled in accordance with the Comprehensive Arbitration Rules of the Judicial Arbitration and Mediation Service, Inc. (“JAMS”) by three arbitrators appointed in accordance with such Rules. The arbitration shall take place in Los Angeles, California, in the English language and the arbitral decision may be enforced in any court. The prevailing party in any action or proceeding to enforce this Agreement shall be entitled to costs and attorneys’ fees. If any part of this Agreement is held invalid or unenforceable, that part will be construed to reflect the parties’ original intent, and the remaining portions will remain in full force and effect. A waiver by either party of any term or condition of this Agreement or any breach thereof, in any one instance, will not waive such term or condition or any subsequent breach thereof. You may assign your rights under this Agreement to any party that consents to, and agrees to be bound by, its terms and conditions; I may assign my rights under this Agreement without condition. This Agreement will be binding upon and will inure to the benefit of the parties, their successors and permitted assigns.

RIGHT OF REFUSAL

You have the right to refuse the terms by typing visiting another website or closing your web-browser and leaving this site.  Continued use of this site implies consent to the Terms of Use of this Blog.